| Author | Date Entered/Modified | Views |
| Daniel A. Stafford | 8/9/2000 6:11:09 AM 9/24/2022 10:24:21 PM | 9702 |
The Family Reunion Speech
The "Family Deal". Hmmm. Some deal, you all get to eat and watch me give this speech!
That's ok, I love to talk & now you have to listen!
Family. It's a different thing than any other word. These are the people you hang with whether
you love them or whether they just bugged you right out of your mind. Of course, they're stuck for
it if you bug them right out of their skin, so watch it! Paybacks come with a "You never know when"
guarantee!
Family. These are the people you turn to when the last "Significant Other" in your life turned
in to that Mr. Hyde lookin' creep right in front of your eyes. They might say "I told you so", but
you turn to 'em anyway! Of course, if they do, you know every time their "Ex" drank the evil
monster potion, too. You already know the guarantee terms and who you are!
Family. If you're hungry, they will feed you, if you're cold, they'll give you a blanket. Whether or not
you're curious, they'll give you advice. Of course, they get cold and hungry, too, and I know the
guarantee terms, too!
Family. If you're upset and crying, they'll give you a towel, a hug, and be stuck listening to you whine.
Then when you get done whining, they get to give you a load of advice and make you wash the towel.
The guarantee terms apply to this clause, too.
Family. If your house just got hit by a runaway bulldozer, they'll give you a couch and a blanket.
They might charge you rent by the day, but the advice is still free. All 25,000 words of it! God help
you if you can't pay the rent, there's a lot of dishes and laundry hanging around…..Of course, that
pain in the butt guarantee is still working.
Family. You wouldn't be here if it wasn't for them. Good thing, too, because you'd probably be stuck
working if you weren't here. I sure am glad I have all of you for family! 'Cause that guarantee means
next time it's your turn to give the speech. And I have to listen no matter how silly it is because you're
family.
I wouldn't have it any other way!
AquarianM
By: Daniel A. Stafford
(C)2000
By: Daniel A. Stafford
Author's Comments
A friend asked me to write a humorous speech on the subject of "Family" recently,
as she has been elected to give this year's speech at the Family Reunion.
This is the result, which I hope is good for some fun.
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| Author | Date Entered/Modified | Views |
| Daniel A. Stafford | 8/9/2000 6:11:09 AM 9/24/2022 10:24:21 PM | 9702 |